Not Home for the Holidays

Children tearing up, waving good-bye
Forever holding the memory
Of a little orange child proof car
Leaving. Taking half of their history with

Christmas morning isn’t the same,
It’s turned to masks and rotten old candy,
Halloween-Christmas style.
Giving children razor blade apples.


Peace and quiet in the house:
Pins dropping heard across the 2 acres
one room to another
(The house finally at sleep!)Decades later

little orange child proof car
Returns, back with more history.
A war at most between blood.

ever feel human

Ever feel pain?
The type of pain you can’t change
Keeping you up at night
Making the doctor’s office your home

Call ID: Cellular call
1-630-715-4059
“Hello, Ash, when would you like an appointment?”
“Same time as last week”

Ever been different?
Felt like you are the only one out there
There’s nothing anyone can do to make you feel human
Doctors make you their lab rat.
You are no longer human.
You are known as lab rat #17.

Ever feel pain?
Knowing you can’t run for life
Your life is your foot.
Knowing you be a fan. Never the sport star.
Watching all your classmates get to play on
Money bars, slip’n’slide, jump rope, kickball.

16 long painful years
A miracle has happened

“drop foot”
FINALLY you know what you have
You have now joined the 6 other people
You are now known as #7 lab rat.

Ever feel pain?
Ever been different?
Ever been human?

lower back treasure

Treasure put on the girls lower back
Forever sealed to her skin
Blue and white in the shape of rose
Red burning flames all around the shape.

Tramp stamp it’s know for
But to the girl it’s known for everything.

Strength. Chosen her lower back
Love. Chosen her lower back
Peace. Chosen her lower back
Courage. Chosen her lower back

shattered love

Flames of the heart burn
Oh how she wishes you knew
What you really meant to her
Before everything shot up

BOMB
All she remembers
All gone in thirty seconds
All she used to know. Laying there
DEAD

Stepped in front of her
Now she wonders:
Who to blame

Was it your best friend or was it the gun man?

unhumanness

Remembering and forgetting, all just human things
Can you still have them when you feel unhuman?
Walking with only one step but having both

I remember tiptoeing downstairs early morning
Sneaking out for school
Where my life begins

I forget where I realized I’m in charge
Of who I am, how I live, what I do
Yet trapped like puppet feeling unhuman.

R.I.P poetry

Too many thoughts are like a swirling
whirlpool in the little mermaid
Swimming all around the paper yet can’t fit together
Picking one topic would just be a disaster
A poet is a multiplying parasite.
Untouched leads to plagiarism
(couldn’t have helped this poem)
Taking away my partying life like Jason Vorhees watching
his victims scream to death
Oh why oh why am I having so much difficulty
Please oh please make this stop
STOP!

dream box remix

teary eyes dancing around the room
ending on a box, this box is not just a box
its where your dreams lay, your heart stops
there's nothing I can do but stand there tearing over it

watching it disappear going under drowning in your good-bye river
holding my breath not saying those words you want to hear waiting for my lungs to fall with yours putting your box next to mine

Teary eyes dancing around the room ending on a box
your box closing every inch it can forever closed to decay
loving you till my last dance on this earth

Exploring the planets up above watching over until the day I join you forever
see that box reappear in front of my eyes
holding inside to dance once more around the room in the air with you

This is my good bye letter to you
don't forget me where my letter is tattooed to my heart
forever with your name